| One of
the best investments in your riding that you can make is to get some
professional instruction. This doesn't mean other riders who like to
tell you your faults, but someone with qualifications and the
ability and patience to communicate those skills.
Things that make you go
hmmmn...
However, even
the best instructors are going to say things that just don't make
any sense to you or don't help you to correct your riding (at least
not right at that moment) This page is a slightly humourous look at
some of the things that your instructor may say to you (or your
riding buddies) that are strange, funny, unhelpful or just plain
stupid once you think about them. Don't get me wrong, it's an
incredibly difficult job and if you are an instructor, I hope that
you smile when you recognise something that you've said to a
student.
Don't Bounce!
All new riders love to bounce
around on the back of their horse like they are the equine
equivalent of crash test dummies. So it is such a kill-joy when we
are happily bouncing around in sitting trot and receive this little
gem from the instructor. Any clues on how to stop bouncing would be
helpful at this stage, because just saying it doesn't make it
happen.
You can't come off a horse, if you keep one leg on each side.
While this may be perfectly true
and intended to have some very 'zen' meaning, it's rather like
saying 'You can't come off a horse if your arse stays in the
saddle''. Unfortunately, that's the problem isn't it...!?
Sit in the deepest part of the seat
Well, actually my arse is covering
quite a large portion of the saddle, so I'm pretty sure that I
have the deepest part covered. Or do you mean my seat? Since I've
learned that my backside is referred to as my seat in riding, are
you now telling me to sit on the deepest part of my backside.
Where is that? Does it change with age? Do skinny people ride
differently from fatter ones?
R-e-l-a-x
You have got to be joking...! If I
release my death-grip now I KNOW I won't have one leg on each side
of the horse, and I definitely won't be sitting in the deepest part
of the saddle. Although I may be sitting in the deepest part of the
arena (but I'd rather not find out thank you). Closely related to
'don't grip'.
BTW It takes a long time before you
can begin to follow this instruction and then you wonder why you
couldn't do it before - but it's a thing called practice along with
some other minor things like competence, balance and confidence ;-)
Are you trying?
Yes. I'm sorry that I'm so
appalling that you have to ask, but this is my best effort and I
really am trying to do what you've told me to do. Perhaps if you
tell me what you see, that makes you think that I'm not putting in
any effort (although I would have thought that my huffing and
puffing or the sweat steaming from me would have been a give away) I
could correct it.
No one ever comes off in the Canter
Really? perhaps I just have a
natural aptitude for this then
...A.K.A.
"No one's ever fallen off in my lesson before" So, you
don't have many students?
Don't just sit there - ride!
Very similar to 'are you trying?'
this is most often heard when you are cantering. You think that you
are slogging your guts out to keep your horse going at the canter,
but for some reason, you appear to be doing absolutely nothing to
your instructor. It's one of those things that you'll hear a lot of
until you learn how riding the canter should really feel. If you
know someone with a video camera - ask them to take some footage of
you - it may help if you can see for yourself what you're doing
until you develop that all important 'feel'.
Up, down, Up, down....
Make up your mind! First you don't
want me to bounce, now I'm going up and down like a jack-in-the-box!
These are the usual instructions for the rising trot to help you
with the right (err.. that's correct) diagonal. The first reaction
to this instruction is to lever yourself out of the saddle in any
fashion, in a skywards direction and then plop back into the
saddle.
After starting off with this
imagery of bobbing up and down, I am still correcting my rise to be
more subtle each time I ride. Although I have been riding the trot
for some time now, I am still trying to correct this up-down
movement into the more subtle forward and back movement.
Keep your heels down!
Now this is a perfectly justified instruction in
its place - but when you are bouncing along wrapped around your
horse's neck, your heels are the least of your problems.
Thanks for the tip, now could you stop laughing!
Are you on the right diagonal?
The correct answer to this question is always -
err no? It's a trick question, only ever asked when you are on the
wrong diagonal. However, if you're quick and happen to be on
the left rein you can proudly answer YES! I am on the right
diagonal! However, my horse is on the left... you'll only get away
with this once so use it wisely as your instructor will then start
asking if you are on the correct diagonal to spoil your fun.
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